Photo by @umityildirim
We started with a list of things that keep us from changing, then we looked at what makes choosing a direction difficult and finally looked at our way of being. We learnt that our way of being is a choice, but we need to practice.
The practice is the practice of saying and doing… with a twist. Instead of forcing ourselves to do what we say, we need to inspire ourselves to adopt a particular way of being that makes the doing easier, almost inspired.
Now we will look at the impediments we will face while trying to adopt ways of being and things to look at when we hit these roadblocks.
To change your life you need to change your priorities - Mark Twain
If you began the practice of creation as mentioned in the previous chapter, the first roadblock you may hit is choosing what to do!
What to do if there is no reason to do it ?
Poverty
While the world is growing economically in leaps and bounds, much of the populace is impoverished.
To understand this statement we need to have a deeper understanding of what poverty means. Why do you think people are not able to free themselves from poverty ? Most people, my father included, got out of poverty by mind-numbing hard work and large dollops of luck.
The real reason people are stuck in poverty is because they don’t have time to think.
Even if you manage to earn enough to have 3 meals a day, one mistake or bad judgement and you are back struggling to make ends meet.
The reason for these bad choices is the number of worries these people need to manage on a daily basis. It’s really hard to consider next steps if you are constantly worrying.
Modern Poverty
Most of us don’t worry about how the next meal will come. For most of us, it’s pick up the phone and Swiggy or Dunzo or some other favourite app, order and food arrives hot in under 45 minutes (“or your money back” in some cases).
Apart from the torture of choosing from a billion options it’s painless and at times even joyful.
Yet, how many of us spend time really dreaming about what’s possible ?
We are ON constantly. There’s work pressure, family pressure, chores, being behind on Netflix, then there’s amazon prime and Hotstar, the gym, payments to be made, recalcitrant maids, panicking on social media about COVID, complaining about kids (having them or not having them) and on and on and on…
Our minds have become so used to putting out fires that when we try to dream, all we can think about are the fires. In fact, under the barrage of modern life, we have lost touch with what we want and more alarmingly stopped planning our future.
I feel that largely, this crisis is because we have forgotten 3 very important truths.
I am enough
I have enough
There is nowhere to reach
We will discuss more about these in a succeeding chapter.
Visualisation
The future you are living into is like a pair of blinders, it doesn’t allow you to see the wide array of possibilities laid out in front of you. You couldn’t even see the moonwalking bear !
Again, it’s just a question of practice, the more you dream, the more your ability to do so. Visualisation is a good way of dreaming.
Seat yourself in a relaxed position. Before you begin visualisation, you need to become present to the future you are living into. Spend 5 minutes acknowledging all the worries you have, don’t resist them, accept them as valid for now. It makes sense to write them down. In the beginning, this may take time :-). Let it take as much time as it takes.
Now, are you settled mentally (settled enough will do) close your eyes if you want to, I personally find keeping my eyes opens helps to avoid the impulse to fall asleep. Now I want you to visualise a scene five years in the future. Five years is chosen to be far enough into the future so you feel that anything is possible. You can choose any interval that frees you for the present and the past.
So, five years (or whatever you have chosen) in the future, the situation is amazing, things have turned out the way you really want. Visualise that future. Maybe you can see yourself driving in your Porsche convertible driving in the south of France, or sitting in the big black boss’s chair at a large corporation. It could be anything that moves you.
Now, colour in the picture, what do you feel in the moment ? Who is around you ? Where are you ? If you are holding coffee, how did it taste ? Can you feel the wind in your hair ? If there is another person in the picture, how do they feel about you ? How do you feel about them? Go through the mix of emotions and be specific what each emotion is. Taste the feeling. If you feel accomplished in the future, you should feel it now. If there is excitement, you should be excited. The more specific you are about the emotional colouring, the better.
It doesn’t have to be an all encompassing view of life, it could be one aspect, your career or your family life or anything else. Don’t try to constrain it to reality. Just answer the question,
Anything is possible, what would your future be ?
Don’t assign a meaning to the visualisation.
Visualising it doesn’t mean it will happen (at all).
It is practice, it’s practising to help you think outside the confines of the future you are living into.
Write it down
Spend about 30 minutes on visualisation and then in your journal just note down anything that feels new. Maybe, you never knew you really wanted a Porsche convertible, write that down OR You felt an emotion in the visualisation that you ache for when you returned to reality, note it down. Did you see someone in your visualisation that you haven’t spoken to for a while, note that down.
Again, DON’T TRY TO CHANGE ANYTHING OR MAKE PLANS, just note it down.
Practice makes practised
This practice strengthens your ability to disconnect from the worries and constraints and as such is a great stress reliever. It allows you to get in touch with what you really want and starts your subconscious looking outside the future you are living into.
Doing this practice once a week should help you get better ideas.
Doing this with a partner is also a great fun exercise. It’s important to setup a ground rule that no-one is allowed to be critical of anything that comes up. Remember to write down everything that comes up in your journal.
Hopefully, this practice will help you get better ideas and get more in touch with what you really want. If during visualisation, worries and distractions keep pulling you in various directions, it points to a lack of peace. We will talk about “Peace” in the next chapter.